On 1/6/2024, my mom and I headed to my brothers house 45 min away and set our GPS. The ETA was 1:16pm. I was driving the car down a long, straight road with cars in front of us and all of a sudden, the radio goes off, the GPS recalculated and the entire scenery changed. My mom looks up and says what just happened?? I hadn’t missed a turn, I knew the road I was on and where the next turn was coming up. All of a sudden, we were in front of a stop sign with no other cars in front of us and I had to slam on the brakes to not run it. The GPS directed me where to go and I told my mom we’d figure out what happened when we got to my brother’s house. We pulled up to his house at 1:16 pm, our exact ETA. We told him what happened and where we were at and he said no way you were there, that’s in Kent (the opposite direction of where we were coming from.) He said how much longer did it take you to get here? I said nothing, we got here at our exact ETA. He said there’s no way because that would’ve taken you at least another half hour to get to where you were. We all kind of brushed it off at the moment and my mom was completely unaffected by the entire thing. Meanwhile, something inside me was extremely unsettled that there was no logical explanation for this (I’d been a very logical, reasonable, rational person…an agnostic RN who found a scientific explanation for everything) and I had to start looking for a reason. I just knew it had something to do with my husband who had passed away suddenly 8/22/22. I got a psychic reading. In the reading, she said that a major event had just happened in my life that really turned things upside down for me and that my husband was with me the whole time and had a hand in it. There were many other things she said that were true and future things she said would happen that did.
Those events started a 6 week (what I can now call a) mystical experience. I had been diagnosed as terminally ill by Cleveland Clinic and Mayo Clinic in 2015. I had a genetic disorder called Ehlers Danlos Syndrome which led to high output heart failure, stage 3B kidney failure and pulmonary hypertension. I was classified as terminal. I couldn’t walk up stairs, I couldn’t walk in stores and I was on over 70 pills a day. I had been prescribed Vicodin for 22 years. The pain I was in constantly was immense. Despite my illnesses, I drank and smoked weed daily. After all of this happened with the car and the psychic, in a series of events and meditations I began channeling my higher self in this time period. I was told that I was healed and would go on to go back to work as a RN and become a nurse practitioner to help patients like myself. In a nutshell, my body is a mirror reflection of my mental, emotional and spiritual wellbeing and all of mine were broken when I got sick. The channel told me to believe I was healed and then I WAS healed. I didn’t stop taking my medication completely but I cut it in half and I was doing fine. I threw the Vicodin out and never had a withdrawal symptom, craving or severe pain since. I’ve not had a drink, used marijuana or wanted either since. I had been treating my diagnoses the whole time by titrating my medications based on weight, symptoms and labs. I knew I was doing it responsibly because of how I was doing. I told my mom and son what was going on and what I was experiencing along the way. My mom has been diagnosed as bipolar her adult life (but she also speaks in tongues and has deep spiritual experiences that she is okay with because it’s Christian…) and I’ve had issues with anxiety. My son felt that I was manic and I’m sure it appeared like that. I had suddenly changed everything about myself and was talking about speaking to my higher self, as a person who would’ve pink slipped my family for doing the same thing. I ended up pink slipped to the psychiatric unit for nine days. I had to stay so long because I was refusing to take the medication they wanted me to take. I knew that I wasn’t having psychosis and I didn’t need that medication. I knew that it was a spiritual experience that I was experiencing. But, that didn’t get me very far.
I was very adamant with the psychiatrist that I was an intuitive empath and channel and I was having a spiritual awakening and that I was of no harm to myself or others. They said that my not taking my health medications as prescribed was self-harm, so that’s how they managed to pink slip me. While I was there, I was still channeling and had quite amazing psychic abilities and was helping every single patient there. Two instances in particular, I had called a friend of mine and she didn’t answer. I psychically heard the conversation she was having with her daughter at the time at her home and she confirmed that when I spoke to her later. I was also able to speak to a patient who had been non verbal for a decade and he spoke to me and gave me his mother’s number to call her. I called her and she was absolutely stunned that he was able to get on the phone and fully converse with her. Even several of the nurses said that the entire energy of the unit was different with my talking with all the patients and helping them. I had to agree to take the medications in order to get discharged. The doctor was threatening to have me court ordered to take medication by forced injections which made absolutely no sense to me and still doesn’t because I wasn’t in a mental health crisis. I was having a spiritual event. The system is wholly broken, but that’s an entire other conversation.
I will say that I truly did find my calling to becoming a psychiatric nurse practitioner while I was there. The system is broken for patients experiencing spiritual events. They immediately want to medicate and sedate. I wasn’t allowed to meditate or given a space to do so. I couldn’t sleep in the room I was given and ended up being assaulted by security to the point of a torn meniscus and dislocated shoulder that I am still getting therapy on. But I digress. One other good thing that came out of the admission was that the lab tests and diagnostic studies showed that my not being on the heart and kidney medications was indeed correct because I was doing better without them. So, ultimately, I was indeed correct and shouldn’t have ever been pink slipped to begin with. I stayed on one dose of a diuretic a day but the rest were stopped. My cardiologist at the Cleveland Clinic has said that I’m a miracle. My nephrologist said the same and that I’ll be off this one diuretic in no time. I went back to work full time in April. I used to be a prison administrator, Emergency Room RN and a legal nurse consultant. I was very aggressive, type A, money and power driven and always had to be right. I went back to work as a home care case manager to be able to have more of an impact in the day to day lives of those struggling with illnesses. I’m going back to school for my masters degree to become a nurse practitioner. Those previous characteristics of myself aren’t there anymore. I feel like I had an “It’s a Wonderful Life” experience because I can see all the errors of my ways. I can readily admit my faults now where I never would’ve before. I am experiencing true empathy for others and myself. I can admit I was an addict and those words would’ve never been uttered by me before. Everything about me has changed for the better. My close family is still learning how to deal with it though because it is such a drastic change. It’s definitely been an experience.
The channeling and psychic abilities came to a halt shortly after I came home from the hospital. Since then, I’ve been on a journey to learn everything I can about this experience and life. I no longer have anxiety, anger, fear or sadness. I have perspective that I’ve never experienced. I’m able to no longer view things through the lens of me but instead through the lens of we. The oneness and divine synchronicity that I have experienced during and since that experience has been nothing short of miraculous. I still have the ability to sense energy and my intuition is still there but it’s nothing like it was. I had a kundalini experience during meditation several months after this started. My eyes were closed and suddenly it was blazing bright white, no longer just black. I then felt pressure and heat at the base of my spine that exploded outward and worked up in steps through my chakras. I felt it exit above my heart chakra. I’m hoping through meditation, work on chakras, reiki healings and continued mental health and spiritual healing that I’ll once again be able to embrace these gifts. I KNOW I had a mystical, spiritually transformative experience. No doubt at all.
Very nice experience, I also have to go through ..well, smaller ..physical part now. I really enjoy it, but it's only a back pain :)
I agree that the "system" is ignorant of the spiritual life, and eventually losing the karmic advantage atheists did have against the church. So lets wait until this karma runs out, at some moment the sources of these things can not receive your psychic help, but you can only make them better (not help them on their road) without karmic penalties; it would feel exhausting to help them with things, which come thanks to psychic people. This is the negative aspect you did not want to talk about.
Positive aspect is another - rather, you cannot cure the system so much, but you can only wait when the nature and God come into play; the nature starts reacting when the crime is physical, it likes to experience. But really, you was a rational person with scientific thought and you are not any more? You need to be whole, and you cannot lose this ability - even in Buddhism, discrimination is important power. When you have higher, more consistent perspective, you see that the laws of nature are still holding, and it's nonsense to think they are very different from what we can repeatedly confirm. But, yes, the confirmations are very limited - as said, the system has no good karma with you, and thus they fail to receive measureable help from the positive aspect of your psychic power. It's not part of their karmic world or loka. You can only help them with what makes them do deep progress, become a better person, and not what makes their current desires being fulfilled somehow magically and miraculously - they have karmic connection with another source of energy, and they create their karmic cycles out of matter.
But, being scientific:
You have to see that the physical matter has somewhat more free will than it seems; indeed, it is more nonlocal and the energy is more wholistic. You can find such hints also from modern physics, not to speak about things like transpersonal psychology.
From science, to spiritual person, the most important are the laws of energy. They hold in any kind of mathematical systems and produce laws of karma, which get stronger through evolution. Evolution happens in any kind of mathematical system, which is complete of something (I don't know, what-completeness it is, but it's like Turing-completeness, which means it can do any calculation expressible). Love is the mathematical syndrome of different reasons resonating in a way that when doing their own things, they also progress with things of others; it's the empowering of the whole instead of it's parts. It's an effect of synergy or mathematical integration. About Karma, you find many general laws - my language in my texts is deliberately complex, but you can read them here: https://spireason.neocities.org/. I am mystical person, spiritual, but I do not fail with scientific explanation, I can see how the logical causes and effects themselves form a magical world, and how the mathematics itself is full of "miracles" (instead of "miracles", I use the word "spectacular", which sounds more like miracles for me; for example like the nature views from Discovery Channel).
You have to reach the proper speech and models, which are commutative - speaking is about vibrations we connect to reality and rather than creating forms, which bring the higher truth into the material form like metaphors, you have to sound full, speaking of mundane world in mundane terms and vibrating also the spiritual sense. After that, it's more easy to accuse the doctors - in your social behavior, it's not nice to reframe the physical terms of other people in ways, which create false impressions about the power of physics. People live on different frequencies and you cannot be sure, whose worlds and lokas you describe properly, but to whose people you are giving false hope or evoking desires they have cured - many science-minded people have cured some rudimentary spiritual mind, which is dangerous for them, for example for not having the right sense of adventure. In certain mental conditions normal to you, other people might break. Also you have accumulated good karma to see all this, or you have the future potential of this empowering you. In words and vibrations, you see many frequencies, starting from bottom - the material - reaching the top - the unified, wholistic view. When you use one frequency to talk about other, or sound false on one frequency when you sound very ideal on another, you create waves of this madness, of people desiring what they cannot get. Notice the little differences between saying "I was in Heaven" against "I felt like in Heaven" - when you feel like in Heaven, you definitely are in some, but when you have feeling that you are in Heaven, you might just feel it. Generally, the higher vibration itself is Heaven, but then, the rich people and politicians are also in heaven and you are no special case. Also, instead of describing your heart chakra creating mathematically impossible patterns others should learn to physically see, and telling them that this experience gives them all they need - the full life experience gives us all we need, and we can say "I felt in with my heart", which is a beautiful metaphor for an atheist and for people with unique senses, it shows that they can connect the language and scientific models with connections they represent. Once you have a very strong and valid philosophy of yourself and your uniqueness, you can more easily be seen to connect the scientific theories with their original facts, which exist, and solve the material aspects of your life situations correctly. Then, interesting hobbies are what they are and you can really accuse the system. The problematic point here is that it's really proven by science that to create a common framework for all people and laboratories, and a standard language and models to reflect the world, we really have to be happy with this rudimentary tautology.
Thank-you for taking up the challenge of spiritual awakening and becoming a psychiatric nurse. Xxx We need you out there!
What an amazing story. Thanks for sharing and congratulations on the healing!! Sorry to hear you went through the mental health system, it always sounds a horrendous experience. Amazing that you now feel you have a new calling though. I can relate so some of what you share as my awakening was also triggered by a series of events very much connected with a loved one who is passed over. And there was some talk of my chronic health issues healing at the time. I also relate your experience of time not passing in the usual way during it. I hope that you are doing ok integrating the experience and ajusting to all the changes 💙
Miracles are real 🙏❤
Thankyou for sharing your story.
I recommend the work of Katie Mottram who has done some great work in educating the mental health profession about spiritual awakening.
We also have a podcast with her.
I also like the concept of spiritual awakening as having a dialogue with one's HIgher Self, it may be a helpful way to view our journey.