Hello everyone. My name is Stephen. I'm from California. It was an absolute pleasure meeting members of the "collective" face to face over Zoom/ Microsoft Meethings yesterday. I would like to express my deep gratitude for the individuals responsible for creating this site. I plan on becoming an active member and contributing (including making donations) as much as I can. I will try to give a very condensed version of my kundalini journey thus far. My awakening occurred back in 2001 when I was in college. I think there were a few reasons why it happened, but the main reason was due to use of hallucinogens, particularly LSD. One night, I smoked weed and felt a little "weird." Yes I was stoned, but something felt a little "off". The next morning, I woke up and felt like there were a thousand volts of electricity coursing through my nervous system. I also felt intense head pressure, saw strobing lights, had extreme anxiety (my resting heart rate was around 180 bpm), and suffered from a few other distressing symptoms. I was so ungrounded I couldn't even sit still. Naturally, these symptoms completely freaked me out. At the time, I had never heard of the term "kundalini" and had no knowIedge of it. I thought the weed I had smoked the night before was laced with something, so I tried to relax and convince myself these symptoms would go away. They didn't. After three days of terror, I did what any "normal" person would do and went to the student health center. I had an EKG and EEG, Both came back negative. Eventually, I was referred to a psychiatrist, and here began my six-year long ordeal with modern psychiatry. For several years, I bounced from psyciatrist to psychiatrist. I told each practitioner that I was suffering from head pressure, that I was feeling like there was a massive amount of energy coursing through my nervous system, that I was feeling very anxious, etc. The psyciatrists did not know what to make of my chief complaints, but were more than willing to dole out medication after medication to "treat" my head pressure. You name the med, I have probably been on it. After a few years of receiving "treatment" from psychiatry, not only did I have head pressure and other kundalini symptoms, but I also weighed 280 pounds and was sleeping for 13-14 hours a day due to all the medication I was on. After several years of hell (which I won't really get in to), I just happended to begin seeing a psychiatrist who was knoweledbable regarding the viewpoints of WIlhelm Reich as well as the concept of orgone energy. Orgone energy is analagous to chi or prana. After a few visits in which this practitioner conducted his assessments/screenings, he eventually informed me that I was going through a kundalini awakening. My initial response was, "WTF is a kundalini?" I went home and did an internet search on it, and all of the symptoms I was experiencing aligned with what I found through my Google searches on kundalini symptoms. I had finally found the answer to what had occurred back in 2001. It took a good nine months to wean myself off of the all the medications I was on. I did this under the care of the "Reichian psychiatrist . " One of those meds was a benzodiazpine. Coming off that one was literal torture. This Reichian psychiatrist provided Reichian therapy interventions as well as breathwork, which were very beneficial. This practitioner literally saved my life. After coming off all the garbage I was on, I was again extremely ungrounded. In fact, I was so ungrounded it was difficult to continue my studies or maintain employment. I tried many things to alleviate my kundalini syndrome symptoms. Some things worked (healthy diet, exercise, light meditation, etc ) while other methods did not. My psychiatrist and I agreed that it would be prudent for me to take a very low dose of a medication in order to allow me to better "function" in society and maintain employment. This particular medication is sedating and seems to suppress my kundalini to a certain extent. I take it for an off-brand purpose, not to treat pyschosis, which is what it is actually intended for. To be honest, it pains my ego to admit that I am taking a psyciatric medication. For many many years, I basically just kind of ignored my kundalini symptoms and adapted to them. Taking a low dose of the medication and just ignoring the symptoms worked for a long time. However, a year or two ago, I kind of had another "mini-kundalini awakening" and experienced another influx of energy. I feel I can no longer just ignore my kundalini and must instead work with it and respect it. I am now willing to surrender to the process. This is why I plan on becoming active on this website. One option would be to increase the medication I am currently taking, but this option would be a last resort. Wow, this post has been way longer than I initially intended. Apologies. Indeed, this post has mainly dealt with the "dark side" of my kundalini experiences. There have been good things too. Several years ago, I experienced an extended bliss state, which was absolutely beautiful. In this state, I felt at one with and connected to everything on this planet. I believe this experience aligned with the perspective of "non-dualism." Sometimes, when this my kundalini is "flowing properly," I feel a sense of inner peace and happiness, but these experiences are not as intense as the prolonged bliss state I experienced years ago. Again, thank you to the creators of this site, and sorry for the lengthy post.
